Third Times a Charm

Okay this was my third summer at Glorieta. This summer looked a butt ton different. I didn’t do media but instead I was a group camp counselor. Group camp is when youth groups come and us counselors run activities, do Bible studies, play group development games and invest in these youth groups for 5 days at a time and do that for two full months. In between those groups, we do housekeeping, clean dishes, run retail shifts and everything in between.

Every summer I have served at Glorieta has looked different and I have grown but this has been the craziest, most impactful, most restful, most fulfilling, most heartbreaking and most stretching summer of my life. I know most of those words are contradictory but I encourage you to read. I already made an Instagram post a long time ago about this, so if you read that and if you feel all deja vu that is why.

Crazy. I literally walked, hiked and danced around 700 miles this summer (I did the math). Before this summer, I put limits on myself as to what I was mentally and physically capable of doing. I had to lead activities, walk kids to the bathroom, hike to Bible studies and dance after breakfasts. I didn’t think my body was capable of doing all of these things but it’s only been possible because of the strength God has put inside of my body.

Impactful. I’ve loved summers at Glorieta but this one beats them all because of how clearly I’ve seen the gospel been lived out. I have seen God work in the hardest of hearts and softest of souls. I didn’t know God could use me this way and I didn’t know that I would be so willing to be used by Him in this way. I could have never thought that campers and leaders would love me so well to buy gifts, write notes, and pray for me and my co counselor. All of this impact only happened because the gospel was preached and that I was a willing servant of the Lord.

Restful. I’ve been forced to run to the Lord to heal my pain. I’ve been forced to come to Him in the earliest of mornings and latest of nights to confess my guilt and shame. My job forced me to not beat around the bush of my identity and how I’ve been trying to live outside of God’s plan for me. My job forced me to open up God’s word and share with campers about God’s goodness and faithfulness. I’ve been surrounded by other staff, friends, bosses who have shared their heart with me and provided Biblical advice. I’ve been able to rest well in the Lord and who He is.

Fulfilling. It is so fulfilling serving others. I never thought I would ever think that. It’s easier when it isn’t about you and your needs but just filling immediate needs for our guests. I love sharing the gospel and using games and activities to point kids back to Christ. I love being vulnerable and crying in front of a crap ton of people because it shows what God is doing. I love being in the mountains, surrounded by creation and breathing crisp air every morning.

Heartbreaking. I put expectations and hopes into lots of things that aren’t Jesus. I’ve learned that those ultimately fail me. When I put my hope in a person, they will fail me. When I put my hope in dreams I have, they will shatter. I have such a strong desire for marriage that it gives me heart ache but God hasn’t called me there right now. I thought I would be working for an organization that I am dedicated to and love so much but God hasn’t called me there. This community of believers I’ve had for three months is leaving, and I don’t have a job. It’s hard for me to type this out because it’s easy to talk to people about it in person when they walk through life with you but sharing it on here is hard and makes this reality real. Through this heartache I’ve learned that I only have Jesus. My hope is in Jesus alone because He is constant. I desire that my heart desires line up with God’s.

Stretching. I learned that I will fail people. My sin will fail me. My body will fail me. I learned that I am not who I think I am most of the time, whether that be positively or negatively. I learned that it isn’t about me. I learned that I will always be growing and being stretched. I learned that I’ve had a lot of growing pains and I cry a lot through them. I am not as joyful as I would like to be but I serve easier than I thought. I can handle more than I expected. I am more easy going and more worried than I believed. I love the Lord more right now than I did in May.

This all goes to prove a point that God is doing wild things in me and I definitely don’t know so don’t ask logistical questions but more so how God is working and how faithful He has been.